“When you look at how Firestone has been acting lately, it’s really jerky,” a spokesman for Ford told reporters. “They are, like, a bunch of egregious jerks.”
Firestone immediately fired back with a statement of its own. “Oh, so we’re jerks?” a Firestone spokesman said. “I guess it takes one to know one!”
Reporters asked the Firestone spokesman if he was surprised by the severity of the Ford spokesman’s attack. “Nothing that butthead says surprises me anymore,” the Firestone spokesman said.
For his part, the Ford spokesman took issue with being called a “butthead” by the Firestone spokesman. “You tell him to come over here and say that to me,” the Ford spokesman said. “I’ll kick the crap out of him.”
The Firestone spokesman, however, was unfazed by the latest threat from the Ford spokesman. “Yeah, right,” the Firestone spokesman told reporters. “I’d like to see him try.”
The battle between Ford and Firestone took a turn for the worse last week when the Firestone spokesman went over to the Ford Motor Co. parking lot and keyed the Ford’s spokesman’s Taurus. The Ford spokesman retaliated by going over to the Firestone spokesman’s house and hurling rolls of toilet paper into the trees on the front lawn.
“When I saw that, I was like, ‘real mature,’” the Firestone spokesman told reporters. “What a jerky butthead.”
